“I hope you won't be offended. I’ve been practicing the Decker Grid™ on my 2 ½ year old son…Holy smokes. What a great parenting tip!”

The Decker Grid™ keeps your message listener-focused with an action and a benefit. You will reach your listeners if you can successfully answer the question, “What’s in it for them?” Make them care.

Using the Decker Grid™ on your kids is the parenting equivalent to waving a magic wand. It works. Effortless influence. As I’ve blogged before, sometimes even I forget to use these principles at home. Whether you are at work or at home, create a listener-focused message to have the most influence.

Here’s a success story from Cole’s dad, a past Decker participant and an economist with a PhD:

“Initial attempt to get Cole to change his diaper. (Note: it is nearly impossible to change his diaper if he doesn't want to.)

Me: I need you to change your diaper

Cole: No. NO! [adds emphasis through eye rolls and stomping]

I remember the listener-focused framework from our training.

Me: Leaving your diaper on too long will give you a rash.

Me: Please come into your bedroom with me and lay down so that I can change your diaper.

Me: If you change your diaper right now, you won't get a rash and you'll be much happier.

Me: Come with me.

Cole: OK [with a smile].

Seriously. It really worked! Turns out that Cole is a very discerning customer of Dad's silly ideas, so I actually have to think about my POV, action and benefit. The more compelling, the more likely it is that Cole will play along.”

From the changing table to the boardroom table, using the Decker Grid™ helps you create a listener-focused message.

We love hearing stories about how you apply the Decker Grid™. When have you successfully influenced someone by shifting your message to be more listener-focused?