Decrease Your Disparity Gap

Snow White

Who do you see when you look in the mirror? Is it the same person your boss, your family, your audience and everyone else sees?

All of us, men and women, alike, can be our own harshest critics. That’s why Dove’s Real Beauty Sketches campaign immediately went viral (as did its parodies).

For those of you who haven’t seen it, yet, the campaign features a forensic sketch artist from the FBI. He asked women to describe the way their faces looked, and he drew a sketch based on each of their descriptions. Then he repeated the process with someone else, a complete stranger, who had just met the same women. The result:

Two pretty different pictures.

The same thing happens when we are speaking. We think we are doing one thing with our actions (based on how it feels when we do them), but the people watching us often experience something different.

The best way way to decrease this disparity gap is by watching yourself on video.

The audience can’t see your heart pounding out of your chest or your mind spinning out of control. They don’t know what section of your notes never made it into your presentation. They only learn what you give them. With the help of our coaches and your video, you learn how to turn your ineffective habits into better ones.

Here’s your assignment:

Using your computer (or phone or camera), record yourself practicing a presentation, or rehearsing the opening you intend to give at your next meeting.

Then, watch it. See yourself as your audience will see you.

If you really want to improve, do it again.

And when you repeat the process, try to over do something. Fake it till you become it. Get out of your comfort zone. Consider:

Own your space, and own your next opportunity. Got it? Now get it on video!


Emotion and Story Rule

You’ve heard us say it before, and we’ll say it again: People buy on emotion and justify with fact. There’s no better place to watch emotions unfold than on the Super Bowl, and it’s no surprise to us that the commercials that stood out were the ones that got us … Continue reading

Actually, Timing IS Everything

“The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot.” Michael Altshuler It’s your turn to present, but long-winded coworker Jeff ate half of your time slot. Your 30 minutes has now been chopped to 15. What do you do (other than eat half of Jeff’s “reserved” … Continue reading

The Significance of Storytelling

After writing about Compartmentalized Communicating, I’ve been thinking about how significant storytelling is to the successful communications experience. Nothing makes that human, emotional connection better than authentic, compelling storytelling. It was Hans Rosling‘s brilliant presentation of statistics at TED India that has kept this topic on my mind. As Hans … Continue reading

Compartmentalized Communicating

“I’m good at sharing facts. I don’t have to use emotion very often, but when I do, I need to speak at the emotion more.” This came from a client in a recent Platinum Session, referring to the commonly-held belief that engaging emotions is an effort we make only for … Continue reading

Feedback in Threes: Keepers, Improvements (& video)

To criticize used to mean “to give counsel.” Now it too often means to tear down. In the age of instant communicating, we need to pause and think about what true “criticism” really means – feedback. Without question, praise is the most powerful motivator. I was amazed at the profound … Continue reading

Decker Made To Stick Messaging is here!

@kellydecker here with a super newsworthy post… Think back to a time when you’ve been so incredibly excited to give someone something that you knew they would LOVE. Maybe it was the Superman PEZ dispenser that your younger brother wanted for his 5th birthday… or your kid’s first bicycle with … Continue reading